Posture

It’s not easy public professing being a Christian. At times I’ve hesitated to publicly proclaim it because it is so easy to be afraid of the persecution. If you slip there are people just waiting to to take note and tell others.  Slipping is the hardest thing because it is so easy to feel guilty. I know I’m not perfect, I know I’ve made mistakes and I know I will make even more mistakes. I’ve hurt peoples feelings and I’ve lifted people up and made them feel better about them or there situation. I try very hard to live the way God wants me to live this life. I try to be patient, to wait, to be slow to anger, to be a blessing to others, to fight the battle within my own mind when things are difficult/trying. I don’t claim to know it all, I don’t claim to have all the answers and I ask God for forgiveness when I sin. I try to be good to people and hope I can be treated the same but that isn’t always the case. I’m a Christian that suffers at times just as everyone does. I turn to my faith for support. I turn to my friends and family when things are difficult. Some days are easy and some are just a struggle from the time the alarm goes off. Yesterday was that kind of day and it seems that I may still be holding on to it. Not because I want to but because I’m human. Hey, things happen and you have to move on. People move in and out of your life. Sometimes you have to accept the fact that no matter how nice and charming and caring you are, people will decline your offer. Sometimes you have to accept their decline and move on. Just move on. That’s very easy for some people. They can just shut it down and move on. The funny thing about it is how I see myself still holding on to the “old” Chip. Turning it all over to God is not easy because we get adapted to the “worldly or earthly” side of life and try to manage things or our agendas by our own means. If we conform to worldly ways then we ultimately lose our spiritual path. I’m sure you’ve heard it said that “everything happens for a reason”. If you subscribe to that then doesn’t it make sense to just let things happen instead of forcing your agenda or what you want? My posture is that I’m here to live life to it’s fullest, to let my passion for life flow and to be who God intends me to be. To do that is to “let go”. It’s a fight. A daily fight. A fight (or having to wait) may last a very long time as it did for Abraham (19 years altogether),  maybe  just until tomorrow,  or it may be until my last breath. All I know is that I’m willing to wait or fight or whatever God wants me to do. I will not give up and I do believe just as Jeremiah 29:11 says: For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Funeral

This man dies a quiet death. His family and friends would say that he had a good life despite what seemed to be an unsettled spirit within him at times. He was well liked, at times very inspirational, helpful to others, kind and well intentioned. The list of his contributions to society was not stellar but it was, again, well intentioned. Those that knew him the best would say that his death was inevitable, though everyone’s is, they would say they saw it coming. So, you get the picture. A good guy by earthly measures and standards. The part of the story that will come as a shock to you is that NO ONE comes to his funeral. There is no grieving, no procession, no ceremony, no wake, no burial, no cremation, no condolences, no crying,  no dinner and actually, no funeral. Nothing! No obituary…nothing. He just died a quiet peaceful death. So why did this man die without notice or event?

Because he didn’t die a physcial death. His death was of an old life and of an earthly life. It’s not a death as we know it but a “white funeral”. Huh? No one enters into the experience of entire sanctification without going through a “white funeral” – the burial of the old life.  If there has never been this crisis of death, sanctification is nothing more than a vision. There must be a death of the old life and the appropriate “white funeral” to accompany it. The “white funeral” has to occur out of the death and there is only one resurrection – a resurrection into the life of Jesus Christ. It has a singular purpose..to serve God. Not the will of an earthly life.

How many times have you flirted with a death of the old life? Walked around the cemetary, looked at your hole in the ground  but never could take your place in the cemetary? In order to have the “white funeral” we have to surrender and submit. Sl0ugh off the earthly ways and desires. To slough off the anxieties, fears, addictions, anger, resentment and other garbage is a BIG change and a leap of faith into eternity. I tell you I am ready to make this agreement with God. I agree with him that this is my last day on this earth and I share my “white funeral” with you as a testament that I can no longer manage  my earthly life. I have to submit and surrender permanently to God. The agreement comes now and you that read this are my the attendees at my “white funeral”. Yes, this is a big public proclamation as anyone with an internet connection and the ability to read english has the ability to persecute me. Of all the days in my life this one has the most significance to date because in a quiet hotel room in Columbia, SC I have surrendered to God completely. Please don’t send flowers…sing praises and if you want to sing a song…sing Amazing Grace and join me.

20K

A pretty cool thing happened lately and it completely slipped by w/o notice. Why? Because I’ve become a little too focused on Facebook mobile. Once I loaded it to the Blackberry it was over! Updates, mobile photo uploads, microstatements about life, commenting on others, catching up with even more people. Wow!!! Been a little overwhelming. It took away from one of the most therapeutic things I have…posting on the blog. Facebook has been a blessing though. I can engage people quickly and share my thoughts, be encouraging, let people know they are an inspiration and, of course, a little ribbing here and there just cause I’m good at it. What’s amazing to me is that it is so easy to be an inspiration as well as be inspired. I can’t imagine I’m the first to do it but I actually had TWO opportunities to witness to people yesterday via Facebook. How amazing is that? Amazing to me considering what a struggle it is to be inspiring at times. I think that God has blessed me with it and I feel compelled to shout to the world that there is a good life to be led and everyone, as children of God, can have it to. I just feel it flowing through me. Of all the garbage that has been a part of my past I finally am beginning to understand the inner peace from knowing Jesus. So, have you forgotten about the cool thing that happened? Not surprising if you did. The blog officially passed 20,000 page visits from it’s inception. Guess all that rambling I’ve been doing over the past 18+ months has been worth reading. I keep hearing that I need to write a book about this experience. How do you write a book about surviving cancer when every day is a new page? The story hasn’t ended. It never will for my time on this Earth may be temporary but I shall live in spirit for eternity.

to create and nurture

I think it’s good to be conscious of our perpetual evolution. Change is inevitable and is a constant event whether we choose to accept it or not. So as change permeates our daily existence we have two choices. We can either be conscious of it and move within it or we can be set adrift in it like a leaf in a turbutlent stream. Moving within change requires study, practice, awareness, engagement, reflection, speculation, good help and a sincere desire to be on the good end of change and not the bad end of it. What happens when we deny or refuse to accept it? The thing I notice within myself is the physical consequences. The stress and tension in denying change is suffocating. That’s not a good feeling. People who move proficiently and move quickly in change like a cat chasing and catching a moth are much better positioned to be champions. Not a hero. Heroes die in the movies. Champions live another day.

The point of the title of this post is simple. Do I want to create and nurture a future in which I want to accept and embrace change? Well, I answered this question many many years ago. The answer is yes. What was missing was an acceptance of what I don’t have the power to change. Sound like the serenity prayer? It’s my serenity prayer. In 2009 I have one resolution…. to see change, to embrace it, to move within it, to create possibilities for others to move within it, to accept what God has in store for me in change and to act upon His will. Not my own. I choose to create a mindset of surrendering to God’s will and to nurture the gifts and blessings He has and will bestow upon me in glory to Him. I surrender…